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Fun Vampires Have, Page 12

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Do vampires have fun? Yeah, despite all the problems we have, we still manage to have some fun. We have more fun than blondes. Here's some of the fun we have, some of the silly situation we sometimes find ourselves in...

Seeking contributions and input. Please see "Fun Vampires Have", p1 for more info.


I'm a college Cross Country runner, and usually go on my summer training runs in the evening. Near the end of my run, I spotted another runner (some athletic guy, about 30), on the hill ahead of me. Something about visible surface veins plus a person running triggered my predatory instincts, and I started sprinting up the hill after him. One part of my brain was asking me what the f*&% I thought I'd do if I caught him; the other was telling me to give chase. I was actually gaining on him, when he heard my footsteps (I can only assume) and looked over his shoulder; he must have seen the crazed predator look in my eyes, because gave me a totally freaked-out look. He peeled out of there, and ducked around a corner behind a building. I can only imagine what he told his buddies when he got home.

Contributed by Fidhealir, from the VCMB

Last year was a little odd for me because most of my awakening happened in the summer. When it was time to start school again, I was a little shocking and kinda odd, especially at the beginning of the year, and people at my tiny preppy high school defiantly took notice of my odd behavior. Needless to say, they made countless vampire jokes and to this day I am known as "the vampire" "Dracula" (which isn't too creative, if you ask me), and my all-time favorite, "Batman"(so named because of the cloak I took to wearing to help keep the sun off me).

One day in gym class, I was standing around not dressed, and not doing anything as usual, and talking to one of my friends. This guy started giving my crap about vampires so I decided to mess with his head a little. I was wearing fangs that day, but you couldn't see them unless i opened my mouth a lot, and I was careful not to let them show.

He was asking questions like, "Do you tun into a bat and fly around?", and I said, "How do you think I got to school today?"

He asked, "How are you out in the day without bursting into flame?", to which I said, "I have a huge, strong sunscreen on today".

He asked a few stupid questions like that until he finally asked, "Do you suck blood?" and I repilied, "Of course I do. Sometimes I pour it on cereal!" I then gave him a huge grin, exposing my newly purchased fangs, and he turned almost as pale as me! -- and never gave me crap about being "the vampire" again!

Yeah...I know vampire girls suck! Ha ha! :p

Contributed by Anonymous

I'm a graveyard haunter. When I can get out of my house at night (sneaking out is so easy), I usually go to the local cemetery and hang out. Now, I don't know why, but there's always this little group of old ladies that's there from 12 to 3, tending their relatives' graves or something.

Once I was sitting in the shadows of a tomb, all decked out in black clothes (capes work well), white makeup and black eyes and lips, the drill. I straighten my hair if I want to be especially vampy, so my hair was down and I had the bottom two inches dyed black. Fangs too. (I have natural fangs, but I wear bigger ones). So I'm sitting in the shadows and I hear (love vamp hearing) these ladies talking about the local legend (a girl who died and came back as a vampyre) and how they know it's just a story.

So when they came past my little hiding spot I stood up real quick. They jumped and stared at me, going an unhealthy color of gray porridge. I grinned and said "Hello..." in a hissing voice. "How are you ladies tonight?"

They stood there and stuttered.

"I was just hanging here for a while...hope you don't mind..." I pointed at the "vampyre's" grave. "I like to get out of the ground once in a while. Care to join me for a little drink?" (I'm a hybrid.)

One of the women kept looking up at me (I'm 5'7") and went: "N-n-no..."

I put a real nasty look on my face and bared my fangs again, then snarled and hissed and moved threateningly (and quickly) toward them. They shrieked and ran for it as quick as their old bones could carry them. Hee hee hee...

Contributed by The Morbid Rose

I was walking around downtown in a huge city in my vamp outfit: black cape, black leather pants, fangs, super pale moonskin (makeup AND my moontan), red lipstick, black tips on my hair, black tank, jewelry and spikes, the usual. My eyes were outlined in black, I'm all freaky looking. So I'm walking around in the city, glaring at people and giving occasional passerby my vamp smile, and this little kid walks by with his mom and starts staring at me, so I grinned at him to show my fangs and hissed.

The kid started wailing his head off! He clung to his mom and screamed at the top of his lungs,: "MOMMY!! MOMMY, THE VAMPYRE'S GONNA GET ME!!!", etc. The lady looked at me all weird, kind of a combo between I'm so sorry my kid's bothering you and OK this girl really does look like a vampyre and Run away. Now. I just smiled at her normally (no fangs) and shrugged. She hurried off, taking the little crybaby with her.

I smiled to myself and kept walking. About a half a mile of walking later, I passed these two teenage guys (about 18) and one girl, same age. They were dressed like me, black clothes, pale skin, so on and so forth. We passed each other and the three just gave me this nod, real respectful and sort of knowing. They just seemed to know who I was and what I was.

That's kind of cool, don't you think?


There is this boy in my class whom I absolutely HATE, but he seems to have fun teasing me and stalking me. One day when I was feeling particularly vampy (almost all black clothes, jewelry, makeup, and so on and so forth), I was sitting next to him in Civics and he (let us call him Crazy Boy) started poking me in the side, asking, "Are you a vampyre or what? What's with the black clothes?" I sat there not answering until he said, "C'mon, little bat, talk to me. Are you a vampyre?"

I snapped, turned to look at him, grinned evilly and then hissed to show off my fangs (nice and white and shhinnnnyyyy...). Crazy Boy screamed like a girl and fell backwards off his chair. The entire class and teacher started laughing their heads off and I just sat there, grinning at him. Crazy Boy hasn't said a word to me since.

Contributed by The Morbid Rose

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