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Problems Vampires Have, Page 15

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This has problems pertaining to dealing with "everyday" (everynight?) things for real vampires. It can get in a light vein, but I would prefer it to be mainly enlightening (jeez, can I quit with these day puns, already???) as to actual problems that vampires have to deal with on a day-to-day (aaarrrggghhh!!!) basis.



Recently my friend had cancer. Durring his chemo-therapy he became an involuntary psi-vamp. He was a huge black hole sucking in every bit of energy that was in the room. One day, he came to me and asked me to do Reiki on him to help him battle the cancer. I did so, and after the session, I explained to him how energy works, and how he was taking other people's energy. I then explained psi-vamps to him as best I can. He was a little confused, and not sure how to react to being told that ,he is a vampire, although it's nothing like he's seen on tv before, and it will probably go away after he is all done with the therapies and the cancer is gone.

He went to another friend to ask if this meant he was evil. That friend spread the story of how my friend was claiming he was a vampire and that I too, am a vampire. Now, every loser that has ever seen half an episode of Buffy is now coming after me, telling me how it is their sacred duty to kill me. I have had four of them come after me; all of them escalated the confrontation into fist fights. Fortunately, this is one area that I am very good at.

Although I hate fighting, I am a blackbelt in 3 different schools, and studying many others by myself. I have learned from the best of the best. Professional fighting champions, Paul Vunak (he designed the R.A.T. System which is taught to Navy SEALS), an ex-Delta Force operative and trainer, and others. I have also learned how to use psi-vamping as a self-defense tool. I first floor them with self-defense techniques, and then drain their energy until they are too weak to hurt me, then I leave them in that state until I can explain to them that I am not evil, I simply am different.

I hate my differences being so public. I hate fighting. I hate losers. I hate Buffy the Vampire Slayer. And I HATE "VAMPIRE SLAYERS".

Contributed by R.I.P. Blacksmith

I am the black sheep of my family, with my pop and skater siblings who act far more acceptably. No one can understand my sleeping hours, or the fact that i passed out in class from being constantly assaulted by the lights and it's "wrong" to wear sunglasses in class.

I am constantly asked if I'm anorexic because I don't eat (which considering my weight is rediculous), but i spend all day drinking stuff. I love breeding and raising rabbits, but so many shows take place in bright auditoriums it's almost not worth it to go and see if they win. I love to swim; however, I nearly drowned in a friend's pool due to less than an hour of sun exposure, which caused me to pass out. This has kept me to swimming only on very cludy days. All in all, it ain't a charmed life but it's mine and I deal with it.

Anyone may feel free to email me at

Contributed by Jess

The greatest problem I have is loneliness. I'm now 19 and I have always thought my suspicions about being a vampyre were just some thread of insanity in the back of my head.

I spent my high school time and the time afterward as a lone observer, watching life pass by. I never felt like I fit in anywhere and all I could do was watch life pass by. I had blood cravings which went unsatisfied until I found a girlfriend who thought it was a romantic way to be not alone while I was away at school. I have always been alone and lost. Everybody who claims to be vampire or goth reeks of poser up where I live. I have been very impatient for life to end.

About a week ago, I finally looked up "Vampires" online and found this site [] and confirmed something I had felt since I was 13. At the same time, my loneliness was finally alleviated. Now I am looking to talk to every Vampyre I can. I have a lot of time to catch up on. Bonus points if I can find one from southern Maine.

Thanks for letting me rant,

P.s. Here is a bitch of a problem for me. I am an EMT and am constantly exposed to blood in a scenario where drinking is not only socially unacceptable but illegal and WRONG. Try thast one on for size.

I've discovered that computer/tv screens pose a problem for vampires; they're way to bright and hurt your eyes/head. No matter how low you make the brightness, it's still no good. Optometrists are problems, too, saying, "Okay, now this won't hurt one bit..." and then shining a wonderfully brite light in your eye while the rest of the room is dark. Hey, I thought he said it wouldn't hurt! So i spaz and rant about how much that really did hurt and get a very scared and suprised look from the stupid jerk. If he had any idea.

Band camp is a problem too (I finally quit). You're out in the sun for 6 hours and your oh-so-caring band director won't let you stop to reapply your sunscreen for the umpteenth time. I can't help it.

Then there's always the wonderfullness of being a skater and watching a friend fall and scrape their knee or leg to all to hell. So i vamp out and get weird, and have to deal with, "What the hell is your problem? Are you some kind of vampire or something? It's just blood..." If they only knew...

Contributed by Lanee

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